Hard To Watch

Our parents teach us everything.  How to walk, talk, eat and love.  They devote their entire lives to making a good life for us.  They are our go to people when ever we need someone to go to. 

My Mom has taught me everything from cooking, sewing, cleaning.  She was my inspiration to become a decorator, she was always moving the furniture around, or recovering a chair or foot stool, painting a room.  She was the CFO of our family and could make a dollar stretch farther than you could imagine.  The unconditional love she has for her three daughters, her grandson and great grandson is amazing.  She also has a big love for animals, as long as I can remember we have always had dogs, cats and what ever else we could talk her into.  And of course if you needed comforting, she is the best on the planet.

My Dad has always been and always will be my hero.  A cool guy, kind of tough, but really a big softy.  He taught me everything from working on cars, how to shoot a gun, to how to fix anything.  He always said he was a jack of all trades, master of none.  But he could fix anything!  He would do anything for his three girls.  Once on the fourth of July, I remember him taking us up on the roof so that we could watch the fire works show over Las Vegas.  Back then our roofs were covered in rocks, so he hauled up a mattress so that we could all sit there and watch the show.  He gave me my love of music, all kinds, he loves it all.  On Sunday mornings while he would cook us an omelette he would play LP records on the stereo, dancing and singing with a spatula in his hand.  Both of them have taught us you can do it yourself.

Over the years, like most families, we had are ups and downs, but they always hung in there, giving us hope and strength.  The toughest tragedy for them was the death of my sister Trudy, she took her own life, I don’t think to this day they have ever stopped blaming themselves. 

Now due to illness and aging I am watching them slip away daily.  It’s the hardest thing I have ever had to do.  I always knew they would grow old one day, but what I didn’t realize is how hard it would be.
Over the past 5 years I have watched my Mom deteriorate both mentally and physically.  She was diagnoised with breast cancer in January 2008 and has beat it.  She has a hard time comprehending and remembering but does pretty good.  My dad suffered a stoke a couple of years ago and he actually came through it pretty good, his eye sight was impaired along his short term memory. 

Both of them take many medications and have a lot of doctor appointments, of which it is hard for either one of them to understand what the doctors are telling them.  We always make a fun day of it by going to lunch or for a drive. 

I love them both so very, very much and even though I am so grateful that they are still here, it’s so hard to watch them change.  I really miss them, the way they were.

Mom, Linda & Dad on his 75th Birthday September 2007

Dad, Mom, Laren, Cole August 2009

TIP:  Keep a typed list of all medications, with dosages on the refrigerator.  When my father had his stroke the paramedics had to write down all of his medications.  However, they did not write down the dosages so it was of no use to the doctor.